Stages of Development in Relationships

Honeymoon – -

This is the beginning of the relationship.

Both parties are actually acting abnormally. Not as in wrong but differently to what they normally would.

Both are acting out of their secondary behaviours in a way that they know subconsciously their new potential partner wants them to and will be pleasing to their potential new partner.

Plateau Stage – During this stage, the partners tend to take each other for granted. Behave and communicate in their normal style, both of you have changed, although you don't see the changes in yourself, only in your partner as you believe this is the way you have always been. (with sexual behaviour tending to level off.)

Some couples can just sit in this stage, at one level comprising and justifying that its all right, I made my bed I have to lie in it.

This is not normally a very happy or in love existence.

On the other hand if the oppositeness of each other become more and more apparent, now it is choice time, you can either keep accentuating the oppositeness to extremes of each other and spiral into trauma.

Before moving into the trauma stage at least one of you preferable both of you need realise that it was actually the oppositeness of each other that attracted you to each other in the first place and what will work to create synergy.

This is the chemistry of opposites, the rose coloured glasses are on so that two people with different behaviours can compliment and balance each other. By learning and understanding the different behaviours and styles of communication of each other, then the differences are a positive strength that is brought to the relationship not a negative opinion or judgement that the behaviour of the other is wrong spiraling from plateau to trauma.

We you recognise and appreciate the strengths of each other then you are connecting synergeticly with each other.

That being when two people work together for the common good they will achieve more than they would as individuals. They will grow in their depth of love for and with each other.

Trauma Stage – At this point the partners behaviour is exaggerated.

Most couples get suck in the first three stages, either going around in circles or breaking up. They may look for counseling

For a the relationship to work long term you have to move Straight from Honeymoon

to Emotional, Physical and Sexual Synergy